Book Review: William Glasser

Unhappy Teenagers: A Way for Parents and Teens to Reach Them
          by Dr. William Glasser   
       

         

This is a good book that discusses and provides excellent examples of Choice Theory parenting, as well as Choice Theory teaching. For the sake of this review, I am concentrating on the parenting aspects of the book. A few years ago, my son was dating a girl whose parents were very strict. They didn’t allow her to do much independently with her friends that wasn’t associated with school activities--activities that they usually attended as well. This may sound like a good way to keep their daughter safe and free from the distractions and negative behavior that most parents fear. However, what actually happened is that this girl, who really did want to please her parents for the most part, started to rebel. She wasn’t allowed to do many of the things her friends did so she began to lie to her parents to get to do “normal” things. When her friends were having a party that her parents wouldn’t approve of, this girl, call her Sarah, would tell her parents that she was staying at Susie’s house and Susie would tell her parents that she was staying at Sarah’s house and the two girls would be out all night unsupervised and no one knew where they were or what they were doing. This is an incredibly dangerous situation.

         

I was concerned about Sarah. One day, she saw Unhappy Teenagers: A Way for Parents and Teens to Reach Them on the back seat of my car and asked to borrow it. I let her take it and she loved the book and wanted her mother to read it. She showed her mother the book and her mother was so hurt that she threw the book outside in the yard. She also proclaimed that Dr. Glasser probably never had any children of his own. Well, I wish I could say that this story had a happy ending. The girl’s parents continued to be very strict and the girl continued to lie and do many things she wouldn’t have normally done had she just had some permission to explore the world. All parties survived the girls’ adolescence but it could have been so much easier. 

         

Just so you know, Dr. Glasser did raise children of his own and he has a very empowering method for both parents and children that is outlined in this book. Everyone wins. He is not suggesting that parents throw up their hands in dismay and just let their children do whatever they want to do. He is proposing that there is a way for parents to be empowered and to empower their teens at the same time. Read the book, you won’t be sorry.
         

      

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